We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the Seniors Special was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $4.99.
"Sounds good," my wife said. "But I don't want the eggs."
"Then, I'll have to charge you $5.49 because you're ordering a la carte," the waitress warned her.
"You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?" my wife asked incredulously.
"YES!!" stated the waitress.
"I'll take the special then." my wife said.
"How do you want your eggs?" the waitress asked.
"Raw and in the shell," my wife replied.
She took the two eggs home.
DON'T MESS WITH SENIORS!!!
WE'VE been around the block more than once!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Sunday, July 27, 2008
ONE MAN'S TRASH... PART 2
In today’s world, going out to eat in restaurants is the norm for folks in all levels of socio-economics. From the richest of the rich to the poorest of the poor– people go out to restaurants at least occasionally for a meal. That was not so in most of the middle-class families of the 50's when the majority, seldom if ever, went “out to dinner.” But today (and it’s been that way for decades) going out to eat is common, which brings me to my story– another story showing that nearly everything in life is relative.
Dorothy and Bill (not their real names) were in their 50's when they came to Memphis to do a marriage intensive with me. Coming from the hill country of Texas, they were a hard working middle class couple whose marriage of 25 years had reached some very rough water and they were using the “D” word much too frequently.
At the end of the first day in therapy (which was six straight hours), Dorothy said to me, “Now, I told Bill, while we’re in Memphis this week, when we go out to dinner, we’re not eating at MacDonald’s every night. You see, I was born in France, and we French are gourmet, and at least one night while we’re here, we’ve going to eat at Shoney’s!”
Sheepishly, she asked. “Dr. Don, do you think that’s asking too much?” I replied. “No. That’s not asking too much. In fact, as part of your therapy, I’m assigning that scoundrel to take you to Shoney’s twice! Okay, Bill?”
He nodded, she smiled and thanked me, they left arm and arm and I learned that same old lesson once again– nearly everything in life is relative. For some folks, eating at Shoney’s is hardly a treat, for others, it’s gourmet!
Dorothy and Bill (not their real names) were in their 50's when they came to Memphis to do a marriage intensive with me. Coming from the hill country of Texas, they were a hard working middle class couple whose marriage of 25 years had reached some very rough water and they were using the “D” word much too frequently.
At the end of the first day in therapy (which was six straight hours), Dorothy said to me, “Now, I told Bill, while we’re in Memphis this week, when we go out to dinner, we’re not eating at MacDonald’s every night. You see, I was born in France, and we French are gourmet, and at least one night while we’re here, we’ve going to eat at Shoney’s!”
Sheepishly, she asked. “Dr. Don, do you think that’s asking too much?” I replied. “No. That’s not asking too much. In fact, as part of your therapy, I’m assigning that scoundrel to take you to Shoney’s twice! Okay, Bill?”
He nodded, she smiled and thanked me, they left arm and arm and I learned that same old lesson once again– nearly everything in life is relative. For some folks, eating at Shoney’s is hardly a treat, for others, it’s gourmet!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
ONE MAN’S TRASH...
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Thus goes the maxim. Does that mean everything is relative? Answering that question or debating that topic would require more than this article will allow. So, this piece will steer clear of the concept of moral relativism and focus instead on the issue of attitudional and experiential relativism which will require at least two posts, maybe more. To begin this discussion, I'll tell a story-- no surprise there, huh?!
At the time this story occured, my office was on the PGA Tournament Players Club on the Southwind Golf Course. Fifty feet from the second green of this multi-million dollar golf course, to say my office had a great view is a gross understatement which is crucial for the story about Ralph (not his real name.)
In his mid-30's, Ralph was a blue collar laborer who lived pay check to pay check with his wife and young child. As he entered my office, the first time he came to see me, he walked straight to the twelve-foot ceiling to floor plate glass windows that looked out on the fairway. Standing there staring, he shook his head.
Sensing his awe, I said, “Pretty sight, huh?!” “Wow. This view is amazing!” “You play golf, do you?” I asked. And in a gesture that looked exactly like Barney Fife, he turned to me, pulled at his belt and said, “Yeah I do. I play a little Putt Putt now and then.” And he was totally serious.
What did I say? Nothing! I bit my lip, ducked into my break room, poured a hot cup of coffee, took a swig in hopes the burn would keep me from bursting into an embarrassing belly laugh.
Ater listening to Ralph for a while, I shamefully realized for the umpteenth time in my life that life really is relative. To some of us playing golf on a Tournament Players course and playing Putt Putt are worlds apart, but to this man and multiplied millions, they are totally equal-- just recreation, diversion, and a game.
Thank you Ralph, I needed that to remind that all of us really are just bozos on the same bus.
At the time this story occured, my office was on the PGA Tournament Players Club on the Southwind Golf Course. Fifty feet from the second green of this multi-million dollar golf course, to say my office had a great view is a gross understatement which is crucial for the story about Ralph (not his real name.)
In his mid-30's, Ralph was a blue collar laborer who lived pay check to pay check with his wife and young child. As he entered my office, the first time he came to see me, he walked straight to the twelve-foot ceiling to floor plate glass windows that looked out on the fairway. Standing there staring, he shook his head.
Sensing his awe, I said, “Pretty sight, huh?!” “Wow. This view is amazing!” “You play golf, do you?” I asked. And in a gesture that looked exactly like Barney Fife, he turned to me, pulled at his belt and said, “Yeah I do. I play a little Putt Putt now and then.” And he was totally serious.
What did I say? Nothing! I bit my lip, ducked into my break room, poured a hot cup of coffee, took a swig in hopes the burn would keep me from bursting into an embarrassing belly laugh.
Ater listening to Ralph for a while, I shamefully realized for the umpteenth time in my life that life really is relative. To some of us playing golf on a Tournament Players course and playing Putt Putt are worlds apart, but to this man and multiplied millions, they are totally equal-- just recreation, diversion, and a game.
Thank you Ralph, I needed that to remind that all of us really are just bozos on the same bus.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
ON THE OTHER HAND...
A former lawyer and judge, Noah S. 'Soggy' Sweat Jr., delivery his famous "Whiskey Speech" in 1952. The ''Whisky Speech'' was political doubletalk at its finest. The speech was delivered in response to the issue of legalizing the sale of liquor in Mississippi. In light of this being a huge election year, it seems appropriate to include this political sidestepping classic.
My friends, I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about whisky. All right, here is how I feel about whisky.
If when you say whisky you mean the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.
But, iIf when you say whisky you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman's step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life's great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it.
This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.
My friends, I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about whisky. All right, here is how I feel about whisky.
If when you say whisky you mean the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.
But, iIf when you say whisky you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman's step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life's great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it.
This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Truman Said It
Capote that is-- in the introduction to In Cold Blood.
"We all have our souls and we all have our facades, and then there's something in between that makes us function as people."
What do you think about this quote from Truman Capote.
"We all have our souls and we all have our facades, and then there's something in between that makes us function as people."
What do you think about this quote from Truman Capote.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
PARENTS GROW, TOO
The growth and evolution of parents in multi-children families is quite interesting, remarkable, and at times down right humorous. Let me explain.
If an honest confession is good for the soul, then I'll take my turn in the tank.
Take pictures of our three children. Matt was born in 1964 and over the next four years, Martha and I made rolls of home movies of that little guy. I spliced them together and in our collection is at least two solid hours of Matt-- just Matt. Born four years later, we also made home movies of Leanne, but that reel is at best 45 minutes long. Chad came along four years later and we made a couple of snapshots of him with a box camera!
Take illnesses. If Matt had the sniffles, we called the pediatrician. If Leanne had 102 fever, we gave her a cool bath and a baby aspirin and rocked her to sleep. If Chad swallowed a quarter, I took it out of his allowance!
Now, of course, you know none of the above is totally true but it does have an element of truth in it-- as parents grow with the process of parenting they become much more reasonable, relaxed, and confident.
So, to all you young parents, stay cool, it'll be alright. To all you older parents, tell those younger parents that what I've just said is true.
If an honest confession is good for the soul, then I'll take my turn in the tank.
Take pictures of our three children. Matt was born in 1964 and over the next four years, Martha and I made rolls of home movies of that little guy. I spliced them together and in our collection is at least two solid hours of Matt-- just Matt. Born four years later, we also made home movies of Leanne, but that reel is at best 45 minutes long. Chad came along four years later and we made a couple of snapshots of him with a box camera!
Take illnesses. If Matt had the sniffles, we called the pediatrician. If Leanne had 102 fever, we gave her a cool bath and a baby aspirin and rocked her to sleep. If Chad swallowed a quarter, I took it out of his allowance!
Now, of course, you know none of the above is totally true but it does have an element of truth in it-- as parents grow with the process of parenting they become much more reasonable, relaxed, and confident.
So, to all you young parents, stay cool, it'll be alright. To all you older parents, tell those younger parents that what I've just said is true.
Saturday, July 5, 2008
FUNNY BONES
I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke .
Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke .
Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Dr. Doyle on Marriage and Divorce
This video is from an interview for divorce-parenting.com Click the link to watch.
Right click the link below and choose "open in a new window" or "new tab"
http://tiny-link.com/vl.asp?h=48311094483QWRWJQ&l=
Right click the link below and choose "open in a new window" or "new tab"
http://tiny-link.com/vl.asp?h=48311094483QWRWJQ&l=
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
JUST FOR FUN
Bubba, while not the brightest bulb in a socket, was a gifted portrait artist. His fame grew and soon people from all over the country were coming to him for paintings.
One day a beautiful young woman pulled up to his house in a stretch limo. She asked Bubba if he would paint her in the nude. This was the first time anyone had made just a request. The beautiful lady said money was no object; she was willing to pay $50,000.
Not wanting to get into trouble with his wife, Bubba asked the lady to wait while he went in the house and conferred with Betty Lou, his wife. In a few minutes he returned and said to the lady, "Okay, I'll paint ya nekkid, but I'll have ta leave my socks on, so's I can have some place to wipe my brushes."
One day a beautiful young woman pulled up to his house in a stretch limo. She asked Bubba if he would paint her in the nude. This was the first time anyone had made just a request. The beautiful lady said money was no object; she was willing to pay $50,000.
Not wanting to get into trouble with his wife, Bubba asked the lady to wait while he went in the house and conferred with Betty Lou, his wife. In a few minutes he returned and said to the lady, "Okay, I'll paint ya nekkid, but I'll have ta leave my socks on, so's I can have some place to wipe my brushes."
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
THE SKIN HORSE
In her classic children's book, The Velveteen Rabbit, Margery Williams has the skin horse to say, "Once you're real, you can never be unreal again."
What a powerful description of what it means to take off our masks, drop our labels, prejudices, denials, and defenses. Far too often, in order to dodge disapproval, we squelch our true opinions; due to the fear of rejection, we silence our beliefs; to avoid confrontation, we sacrifice our personal truth.
In so doing, we accept the slavery of unreal living in order to avert rejection and disapproval. But living that isn't real, isn't living at all.
One of the great satisfactions of being a therapist, comes through seeing people set aside the bondage of masks, labels, and defenses and emerge as real, never to be unreal again.
What a powerful description of what it means to take off our masks, drop our labels, prejudices, denials, and defenses. Far too often, in order to dodge disapproval, we squelch our true opinions; due to the fear of rejection, we silence our beliefs; to avoid confrontation, we sacrifice our personal truth.
In so doing, we accept the slavery of unreal living in order to avert rejection and disapproval. But living that isn't real, isn't living at all.
One of the great satisfactions of being a therapist, comes through seeing people set aside the bondage of masks, labels, and defenses and emerge as real, never to be unreal again.
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