In frontier days, roadways often had signs that read, Pick Your Ruts Well– You'll be in them for the next 100 miles!
During relational therapy, I hear a lot of complaints about being in a rut, nothing ever changing, starting over again and again, only to end up back in the same old rut.
They identify totally with the sign, Pick your ruts well you'll be in them for the next 100 miles.
Why is that so? Why do we end up back in the same old ruts? Well, for starters, because we play the blame game, and we try to make changes by focusing on behavior rather than causes, and we deal with facts rather than feelings. It seldom works.
But it's an interesting thing how so many relationships that are in a rut have the potential to get in a groove. It takes some work but it may not be as far from a rut to a groove as you think.
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